Saturday, January 30, 2010

Marriage

Don't worry. Today, on my 16th anniversary, I won't quote Heinlein again, though I still feel he described marriage as well as anyone could. Right now there is a court case going on to try and declare Prop 8 in California unconstitutional. And the opposing side keep going on about how marriage is for the purpose of procreation of children, therefore there cannot be gay marriage. Huh? What about "childless by choice" couples--they shouldn't be allowed to get married? Should couples who want to have children but sadly cannot not be married? What about after your reproductive years are over--if you meet someone and fall in love, shouldn't you be allowed to get married? My parents, bless them, will hopefully be celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary this June. It's been 25 years since my brother and I left home. Only one half of their lives was about child rearing. Marriage is about being with someone you care about and sharing their life. Dealing with blocked toilets and taxes. Health scares and financial worries. Cooking meals and planning vacations. Home improvements and home disasters. Arguing about tiny things that drive you mad and sharing jokes that only the two of you understand. Going through the triumphs and the tragedies that make up our lives. Building a life together and knowing that though there are millions of other people out there, no one else in the world could have given you the things your partner has given you in just that way. That's got nothing, NOTHING to do with sex. And while it can include children--the children of your body or the children that become yours by virtue of your love--it doesn't start or end with your children. Letting everyone marry the person of their choice wouldn't weaken the institution of marriage. Far from it. It would say that marriage is a vital institution--so vital that we want everyone to have the chance to experience it. And shame on anyone who will say otherwise.

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